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Sf. Nicolae Velimirovici: Cobor adânc în sufletul meu, spre a vedea cine se naşte într-însul şi cine pleacă din el

Sf. Nicolae Velimirovici: Cobor adânc în sufletul meu, spre a vedea cine se naşte într-însul şi cine pleacă din el

Cobor adânc în sufletul meu, spre a vedea cine se naşte într-însul şi cine pleacă din el. Cât de îngrozitor este adâncul sufletului omenesc… O, Mire al Cerului, când oare vreun om îndrăzneşte să se cufunde într-însul! Cel ce îndrăzneşte se cufundă prin adâncurile lumii şi iadului, în drum spre cetele albe ca zăpada ale îngerilor, care te înconjoară ca pe un veşmânt.

Am fost uimit, când am văzut mulţimea celor prăşiţi în sufletul meu, care erau înspăimântaţi de mine, zburând într-o parte precum corbii înspăimântaţi de la un stârv. Iar sufletul meu zăcea acolo sedus de beţivii Babilonului ca o femeie deşănţată care-şi uitase logodnicul. Şi cu mânia unui famen şi în chipul unuia prins asupra faptului, sufletul meu a început să se justifice. Chiar mai înainte de a fi existat o acuzaţie, el a început să se îndreptăţească pe sine, spunând „Nu vă port eu pe voi, fiilor? Nu vă trimit eu duhuri?”.

Dar eu mi-am ascuns chipul de ruşine şi am spus: „Cu adevărat, şi întru aceasta sunt de aflat atât căderea mea, cât şi a ta; fiindcă tu îmi tot păstrezi mie fii, când eu de fapt am nevoie de Fiul, iar tu îmi tot trimiţi duhuri, când eu am nevoie de Duhul. Tu nu mi-ai trimis duhuri, ci demonii cei necuraţi ai iadului. Ca o fecioară mi-ai fost dată mie, ruda ta, spre ocrotire, ca tu să poţi zămisli de la Duhul Sfânt şi să-L naşti pe Fiul. Dar tu, această fetişcană, n-ai zămislit de la Dumnezeu, ci de la lume, şi nu mi L-ai născut pe Dumnezeu, ci lumea. De ce nu L-ai aşteptat pe Duhul lui Dumnezeu întru feciorie, primind în schimb duhurile întunericului, care s-au înmulţit înlăuntrul tău şi mi-ai înrobit inima?

Sfântul Ierarh Nicolae Velimirovici, Rugăciuni pe malul lacului, Editura Anestis, 2006

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